Sunday, June 18, 2006

The content of this entry probably won't go over too well seeing as most of my readers are women. Nevertheless, something has got to be said.

I know I am not alone in complaining about this.

When women who have recently given birth or who are expecting get together, the conversation inevitably turns to the gory details of labor and delivery. I call it "talking about discharge."

One fine example of this phenomenon happened during a Sunday dinner at my mom's house. Along with my siblings, our spouses and our kids, my mom had invited over a Venezuelan couple and their newborn baby. In all there were probably four women who had recently given birth or were expecting.

Before the food was even on the table, the conversation turned to labor and delivery. Suddenly it was "afterbirth this" and "mucous plug" that. . . Then the Venezuelan lady uttered a line that is forever seared in my memory. "Gwen I had birth, my bar-china tore to my rectoom."

For the love of all that is holy, let me eat in peace.

7 comments:

AzĂșcar said...

For the love, not at the dinner table!

For the record, even the phrase "mucous plug" gives Joe the heebie-jeebies.

Marty said...

The best, or worst, was hearing all that stuff in a Testimony meeting in Texas.

Marty

AzĂșcar said...

I'm sorry, what?

A testimony meeting? Oh my stars. Have some decorum people!

La Yen said...

Amen, brother Dave. I pick up my babies a few days after they are expelled. I know nothing about plugs, nor do I want to.

La Yen said...

Amen, brother Dave. I pick up my babies a few days after they are expelled. I know nothing about plugs, nor do I want to.

~j. said...

Hahahaha! How did you eat after hearing that?!

justin hileman said...

I think this blog post is the Dave Hurtado equivalent of The Game. I hadn't thought of this post since you wrote it.

I was minding my own business today, and out of nowhere I remembered this post. In vivid detail. Venezuelan accent and all.

Thanks, Dave. I just lost The Rectoom Game.