Sunday, August 05, 2007

This weekend was our fifth annual "Provophenia" scooter rally. Here are the details:

On Friday we met at 4pm at the store. There were about ten scooters. Those who came early voluntarily cleaned up the back lot, which was really nice of them. I can't say thank you enough. Derek T.O.B, Martinio, the Mowers and Jay from Boise were especially helpful. When we finally left we took a roundabout route through the foothills of Provo, past BYU and down highway 89 into Springville. We ate at Brand X.

I don't know whose idea it was to eat at Brand X, but I'm looking in the general direction of Dusty Bottoms and Flocahontas. It could also have been Tommy Two Shoes' idea, but he doesn't eat beef, so I doubt it.

Whoever is responsible, I'm glad there was a McDonalds across the street with a restroom. I'm also glad I bought a copy of the Daily Herald there, because I needed something to read. I've found that when there is an emergency of this nature, reading material is the best medicine. Without it, the IBS I got after my first adventure with Cafe Rio would surely have had me doubled over in agony. Brand X is pretty beat down. I ate there once a few years ago, and all I remembered was that there were a lot of flies, and that the food was good. At least my memory was right about one thing. There's still a lot of flies.

After Brand X some people split, the rest of us rode out past Lincoln Beach, around West Mountain and into Genola. Then we headed back through Santaquin, Payson, Spanish Fork and Springville. It was a nice long ride.

On Saturday we met at the store again for a barbecue, scooter shenanigans Derek T.O.B. put together, and a ride around the Alpine Loop. Dereks Slow Race and Scooter Slalom were a hit. Nearly everyone participated, and Dusty Bottoms won a free massage from Tim. It was down to me and Dustin, and frankly, I'm glad Dustin won, because I would feel a little too much like George Costanza getting massaged by a dude. I know it's different for women, but in my book, massage is just a means to an end-- like foreplay. I've heard it said, "backrubs in the front room lead to front rubs in the back room." Truer words. . .

So Tim, nothing personal, but you and Dustin have a nice time, ok?

The ride around the loop was great as usual. We had a total of 21 scooters in attendance. After the ride we went to sliding rock in Alpine. It was fun too, though only my wife and I actually went down the slide. Everybody else wussed out.

But the real purpose of Provophenia for me, was to have fun with my friends and get out and enjoy scootering for a change. Thanks to everyone who came. I hope you all had a great time.


AzĂșcar said...

Brand X changed managers or something because they are not as good as they used to be.
Why mess with something that was working? I'll never know.

JayB said...

Thanks for showing me the Utah countryside!

After another clutch failure, I called it an afternoon and went to Bourne Ultimatum with the family. They were entertained, while I seethed at killing two scooters in two days.

Martin said...

Great as usual Dave, and anything for the cause. Jay, sorry it didn't work out, we all wondered what happened to you!!


JayB said...

Thanks Marty,

It was great meeting every one. I know now that I should program at least two cell phone numbers. That way I can call someone and tell them I am... going... home... and... taking... my... ball... with... me.