Sunday, June 28, 2009

Grace, by U2

Grace
She takes the blame
She covers the shame
Removes the stain
It could be her name

Grace
It's a name for a girl
It's also a thought that changed the world
And when she walks on the street
You can hear the strings
Grace finds goodness in everything

Grace, she's got the walk
Not on a ramp or on chalk
She's got the time to talk
She travels outside of karma
She travels outside of karma
When she goes to work
You can hear her strings
Grace finds beauty in everything

Grace, she carries a world on her hips
No champagne flute for her lips
No twirls or skips between her fingertips
She carries a pearl in perfect condition

What once was hurt
What once was friction
What left a mark
No longer stings
Because grace makes beauty
Out of ugly things

Grace makes beauty out of ugly things

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

From "Why can't I be good?"
by Lou Reed

I want to be like the wind
When it uproots a tree
Carries it across an ocean
To plant in a valley
I want to be like the sun
That makes it flourish and grow
I don't want to be
What I am anymore


In many ways I feel as though I have just awakened from a fitful sleep, in other ways I feel that I have slipped over the edge of a precipice and have only just begun to climb back up. Honesty, displaced for so long, has the dizzying effect of making one feel simultaneously empowered and liberated on one hand, and overwhelmed by reality on the other.

There are moments of my life remembered as though I had awakened to find manna on the ground around me, and there are moments which struck as a thousand raindrops or snowflakes, a sudden thunderstorm, or a swim in cold water. There are also, unfortunately, moments remembered as though I had stepped in filth, stumbled in a pig-mire, or fallen into an abyss.

Why can't I be good? Why is it so hard to consistently make good choices?

It's gotten a lot easier since I got honest. Thank God for honesty.
Prodigal

In miry clay obscurity
I squandered my inheritance
A potsherds insincerity
Kiln-broken, crushed to penitence

Begging food I supped with swine
Deep hunger was my souls lament
Unworthy to be called thy son
To be thy slave was my intent

When from afar thou sawest me
And sped my the compassion cup
The fatted calf gave mercy meat
The bitter dregs were swallowed up

Oh Father. . .

May I bend my will and cleave to thine
May I render thee my soul in fine
My heart, my life thou gavest me
All gratitude be unto thee!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Spiritual experiences have been few and far between for me over the past several years. And any effort to cultivate them on my part resulted in being faced with the dilemma, the elephant in the room, that has ridden on my back all this time. The creature from which I couldn't be freed without being honest was too heavy to carry yet I persisted in silence for fear of the fallout I knew would punch radioactive holes in everything I hold dear. I tried to find a fallout shelter, knowing full well that there are no loopholes in the law of repentance.

Yet the spirit didn't stop striving with me. All this time He didn't stop. I begged Him not to stop.

I recently had a spiritual experience in the shower. I was listening to Fix You by Coldplay and as I sang along to the words, "Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you", I was overcome as I felt the spirit testify the truth of that message to me.

So now I have freed the elephant. I decided to take the advice of a wise leader and "hope for the best, prepare for the worst, and accept whatever came." So far we are okay.

I know that I can be fixed.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Miracle Drug
U2

I want a trip inside your head
Spend the day there…
To hear the things you haven't said
And see what you might see

I want to hear you when you call
Do you feel anything at all?
I want to see your thoughts take shape
And walk right out

Freedom has a scent
Like the top of a new born baby's head

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've seen enough I'm not giving up
On a miracle drug

Of science and the human heart
There is no limit
There is no failure here sweetheart
Just when you quit…

I am you and you are mine
Love makes nonsense of space
And time… will disappear
Love and logic keep us clear
Reason is on our side, love…

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've had enough of romantic love
I'd give it up, yeah, I'd give it up
For a miracle, a miracle drug, a miracle drug

God I need your help tonight

Beneath the noise
Below the din
I hear your voice
It's whispering
In science and in medicine
“I was a stranger
You took me in”

The songs are in your eyes
I see them when you smile
I've had enough of romantic love
I'd give it up, yeah, I'd give it up
For a miracle, miracle drug

Miracle, miracle drug

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Neighborhood #4 (7 Kettles)
The Arcade Fire

I am waitin' 'til I don't know when,
cause I'm sure it's gonna happen then.
Time keeps creepin' through the neighborhood,
killing old folks, wakin' up babies just like we knew it would.

All the neighbors are startin' up a fire,
burning all the old folks the witches and the liars.
My eyes are covered by the hands of my unborn kids,
but my heart keeps watchin' through the skin of my eyelids.

They say a watched pot won't ever boil,
well I closed my eyes and nothin' changed,
just some water getting hotter in the flames.

It's not a lover I want no more,
and it's not heaven I'm pining for,
but there's some spirit I used to know,
that's been drowned out by the radio!

They say a watched pot won't ever boil,
you can't raise a baby on motor oil,
just like a seed down in the soil you gotta give it time.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Crown of Love
Arcade Fire

They say it fades if you let it,
love was made to forget it.
I carved your name across my eyelids,
you pray for rain I pray for blindness.

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love is fallen from me.
If you still want me, please forgive me,
because the spark is not within me.

I snuffed it out before my mom walked in my bedroom.

The only thing that you keep changin'
is your name, my love keeps growin'
still the same, just like a cancer,
and you won't give me a straight answer!

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love has fallen from me.
If you still want me please forgive me
because your hands are not upon me.

I shrugged them off before my mom walked in my bedroom.

The pains of love, and they keep growin',
in my heart there's flowers growin'
on the grave of our old love,
since you gave me a straight answer.

If you still want me, please forgive me,
the crown of love is not upon me
If you still want me, please forgive me,
'cause the spark is not within me.
it's not within me, it's not within me.

You gotta be the one,
you gotta be the way,
your name is the only word that I can say

You gotta be the one,
you gotta be the way,
your name is the only word , the only word that I can say!

Only one that I can say!